Today 4 years ago I left the most disturbing and controlling relation, I could never forget today's date and celebrate it as my Independence Day. I am free and happy now but that wasn't the case 4 years ago. I thought I would be stuck with him forever but luckily I flew away and that was the best decision I ever made. Now when I look at my little one I feel more proud of myself for leaving that abusive relationship. If my daughter would have been witnessed all the drama going on in my life due to a bad partner, she would have thought it is normal for a guy to treat a woman like this. But that's not the case now, and I am happy about that. I am single and a mother to a fabulous girl and my life couldn't be better. I am happy in my little family and that's the way it should be.
I remember when I was in that relation I use to avoid looking at myself in mirror, it used to make me more sad and depressed about my life with him. It was like walking on egg shells, anything could happen anytime, he could loose it anytime and start screaming and blaming me. Been with him was the biggest mistake of my life but I got something amazing out of it that is my daughter. Before the marriage he was a nice normal guy or may be I missed the signs that he was insane. Once we were married I saw change in his behavior towards all the women in his life which includes me, his mother and sisters. But as it was all very new to me and him, I decided to give it all abit more time and wait for everything to settle down, but what I have learned is that they never change. Can I change my behavior? NO. So how did I even think he can be something better? I know it was that girl inside me who wanted my marriage to work out and was giving him more and more chances to fix the things.
Unfortunately we are surrounded by people who judge us by status Single - Married - Divorced. A majority of people think that girls like me who fall in Divorced category are ready to go out with anyone and are the one to be blamed for the whole relationship fall down. I don't even have to go far to friends, in my own family I got many people who gave me that look when I left him. I must say it did broke my heart but it didn't made me change my mind, it just made me look more clearer that those people who are not happy with my decision are actually the one with this cheap mentality that a women is below men, and that's not how I have been raised. My father is a very loving and caring father and husband, it doesn't mean they never had fights or there were never problems, but they went through all the problems together and still there for each other. It gives me great satisfaction that I had a great picture in my heart about the perfect man and that made me move on from that relation.
Today I want to thank all the lovely people who cared about me and stood beside me through that hard time, they are a hand few and better than having heaps of Frenemies. One angel like cousin and his wife, couple of friends + my loving family stood beside me when I took the decision. That's all what it takes few close friends/relatives to make you feel more confident and think clearer. Thank you to all those who supported me and I can never express the love and respect I have for you in my heart. Plus even more thankful to those who didn't care and were gossiping about me being a bad wife, as you all give me that push to go on and do more and prove you wrong. Now I am here happy and content. I want to share my story so any women out there suffering what I suffered before can read it and if its even 1% helpful to them I will be very happy.
Ps feel free to share your story or any support you need. xx
Thank you for reading.
Keep Smiling :)
