Ever since we are born, we become our parents dream and they set some rules and boundaries for us to shape and help us grow into a better person, which allows us to either fulfil their dream or our dream. Thankfully I have become one of those people I would like myself to be.
Even when my marriage broke down 95% of people disappeared from my life. It would be wrong if I say it didn't hurt me, but I was already broken with my marriage so it didn't gave me much of a shock. Then there were those people who started attracting to me mostly because I was in same situation like them, being a divorcee. Some became really good friends and some just stayed for awhile and then disappeared. Even in the church I used to go, I became a Hot Topic after my divorce, people wanted to interact either to gossip or for a marriage proposal with someone with no visa, once I made it clear that I was not interested than all the people disappeared.
My life has always been like a up down hill road, one comes and one is ready to leave. But ironically it never happened with a partner, I wish it did, lol.. ;) I always dreamed of a good looking guy with killing looks coming my way, but it never even happened. I am no Miss Universe so I guess I over expected from my dream man as well, but I must say I did got many proposals from which mostly were due to Residency purpose. As I am citizen and many Indian guys are here on either no visa or struggling to extend there visa, they will truly even marry a 60 year old, so I am certainly a better option. I have spoken to a guy once who was only interested in going to a lawyer to discuss his residency after getting married to me, and didn't even asked me one question about myself, and that was it, I said NO. I still believe that one day my prince charming will come and fit in my life like a puzzle does, that day all the wrongs will become right and all the sadness will turn into happiness.
I have passed 30 years in struggling but still believing that good thing happens to good people, I do loose my hope every now and then, but always happy with whatever decisions I make. But on those dark days when I am super low and see no light at the end of the tunnel, I have wonderful friends/family + super gorgeous daughter who makes me see my dreams again.
